Falling in love is meant to be one of the best feelings you’ll experience. However, falling for someone outside of your relationship is a difficult position to be in and can be destructive and heartbreaking to you and your partner if you let it. However, before you make any major decisions that you’ll only end up regretting, ask yourself these questions.
What can the new guy give you that your boyfriend can’t?
When you’re considering leaving your boyfriend for another guy, you have to analyze everything. One of those things is determining what the new person might give you that your current boyfriend can’t. Can the things that you are not getting from your current boyfriend be resolved? You have to consider that when you first start dating a guy, he’ll give you all your wants and needs just to impress you to keep you around. If the new guy you’re interested in gets comfortable and stops making a fuss over you, will you still want to be with him?
Are you looking for an escape hatch out of your relationship?
No one can help it when they falling for someone else, but it’s important to be honest with yourself when you’re considering making a life-changing decision. You have to ask yourself, have you been wanting to get out of your current relationship for a while? If so, dating someone new is probably not the best idea even though it might feel like it.
Can the new guy love you as much as your boyfriend does?
You could be madly in love with a person, but that intensity of love might not be reciprocated. Before you make a decision about who to be with, make sure that the love that you give is appreciated and reciprocated. Ask yourself whose actions show that they love you the most. All relationships need love and balance. If you don’t have that now, can you guarantee you’ll have it with the new guy you’re falling for?
Are you truly falling in love or are you filling a void?
Are you lacking something in your current relationship that you’re seeking in this new guy? Write a list of all the feelings the new guy gives that your boyfriend doesn’t. If you find that everything you like about the new guy is what you’re lacking in your current relationship, you have to question whether you’re genuinely falling in love or if you’re filling a void by seeking your wants and emotional needs elsewhere. If your boyfriend is willing to communicate and listen to you, a lot of those voids can be resolved. If he’s not willing to make an effort, it’s definitely time to move on!
Does your current relationship have longevity?
Being in a relationship that you know has longevity is comforting and is the ideal goal for a lot of couples. If the new guy you’re falling for wasn’t around, do you think your current relationship would have the potential to last a long time? When you feel like your falling in love it’s easy to think short-term because everything is so new and perfect. After taking everything into consideration, if you believe that you will have a long-lasting relationship with the new person, it’s best to let go of your current relationship.
Can you live with your decision if it doesn’t work out?
Is your current relationship completely over, so much so you won’t look back even if it doesn’t work out with the new guy? If so, there are no more questions you need to ask yourself. That relationship was probably already on its way out! But if not, is leaving your relationship for someone new is worth the risk? You can’t guarantee that things will plan out as you planned in your head, but you can live a life of no regrets. Whatever decision you make, trust yourself and be content with your choice no matter what the outcome is.
What does your intuition tell you?
Your intuition is there to guide you, listen to it. If you get the feeling that you have to let go of the relationship that you’re in, then that’s probably what’s best for you. The annoying thing about listening to your intuition is that it feels really uncomfortable when you make the decision to do so.
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